Whatever you spend the most time on that's what you place the highest priority. His priorities are off IMO and is making a bad decision. When I'm on my death bed I'm not going to look back and say, man I'm glad I trained so hard running, biking and swimming all those miles. But rather that I wish I spent more time with my wife and kids. I think it's great people run these races but the bottom line is that there has to be some kind of balance. If he likes it so much, his wife and him have to come to a compromise. Marriage isn't one person giving 50 and the other 50 but both giving 100% into the marriage. My brother is into the triathlon thing but he's single. He's got all the time in the world to train not to mention the earning power to get the equipment he needs to make him better. When the time comes down the road for him to have a family everything takes second place to your family. If not, what's the point of even starting a family?
BINGO! Like Morey says, maximize your assets.. trade in that old Morgan Fairchild for a brand new Megan Fox.
Ok, I see where you are coming from, but let's shift the threads direction a bit. Is it really in your business to try to intervene?
Sounds like the dude just maybe isn't all that into his marriage. Thirty hours a week seems excessive for an iron-man, much less a regular triathlon. I don't know even know how a normal person's body could take that much exertion. I run marathons, and don't spend much more than 7 hours a week training.
If you're serious about "helping" out the family do this: Call him tell him you want to "Train" with him. When you go "Train" during the jogging phase fall akwardly towards his knees. Make sure you get him right on the side so that you tear something for sure. Problem fixed! He "accidentaly" blows out his knee, can't train, is forced to stay home and the marriage survives. All thanks to you!
Just finished Ironman Texas last weekend and have been doing long distance triathlons for the past 2-3 years, including very extensive training for the last 4-5 months. So I guess you could call me an "obsessive triathlete." But 30 hours/week of training is not unreasonable and a lot of people I know, including ones with families and time-consuming occupations, do more than that while being able to maintain everything else in their life. Of course some sacrifices have to be made and I have no idea of your buddy's at-home situation, but I wouldn't blame triathlons as the sole reason for the outcome of his situation. It probably wouldn't be any different if he was playing racquetball 30+ hours a week. If he is neglecting his family duties, then he does have to get his priorities straight, but that has more to do with his personal mindset than anything else.
Perhaps so, but triathlon training can give one tunnelvision - focusing exclusively on the race. My job is to make him see the forest through the trees. If that does not work, then I will be making dinner plans with his wife to discuss her future. Spoiler Last comment was in jest
I want to say something must have been up before this. The obsession is a result. I'm going to guess he couldn't get it up, so is using this as a outlet.
May I ask if you would start a family with such a hectic schedule, or would you wisely scale back your training?
If your "passion" winds up with you getting divorced and screwing up your kids for the rest of their lives...it's not "passion", it's a problem. I have plenty of things I'm passionate about. They still take the backburner to my kids and my wife. Because that's absolutely the correct order of priorities. This thread is flaming depressing.
A new triathlon training partner? On a serious note... why is any of this your business? My guess is that your friend is happier now than he has been in a long time. It takes a great deal of desire and passion to train 30 hours a week. Sounds like your friend isn't that into his marriage or family. That is his call, and while you can judge him for it, you cannot change it. It is not right to force him to spend time with his family.
