Let me preface this by saying I have never ever had any problem with any neighbor, wherever I lived. Since we moved here, we have gotten to know a few neighbors, and they have all been lovely. The neighbor to one side of our house, I have never seen, apparently an elderly lady. My wife and kids went over when we first moved here, but only met some staff member. Anyway, this lady has these wind chimes, and they are quite loud. I can hear them with the windows closed, and obviously, it can be windy at night. It kind of sounds like nonstop church bells. Has this ever happened to anyone else, and what would you do?
Man, those must be some loud wind chimes if you can hear them with your windows closed. Or they're like 10 feet from your window? I actually find wind chimes very relaxing, but the wife hates them and won't let me buy any. At any rate, I'd be very interested to see how @Trader_Jorge would handle this situation.
she's hard of hearing, sir! you'll have to speak up! I SAID YOU'LL HAVE TO SPEAK UP AS SHE CAN'T HEAR WHAT YOU'RE SAYING SIR ON THE ACCOUNT OF...SHE'S DEAF!
Is he in an HOA? If so, I would try to pass a motion at the next HOA meeting to prohibit windchimes. Work the voters behind the scenes to ensure success. If you are not in an HOA, then I would send them a letter saying that wind chimes are prohibited per a local ordinance. Fabricate it even if it's not true. Mention a $1,000+ fine. You'll have to spruce it up to make it look official. Never confront them because that will piss them off, give away your identity, and motivate them to annoy you further. Stay hidden, then strike. If nothing else works, then simply go over there and rip down the chimes. Leave a broken one on the ground as a warning signal.
You need to assert your masculinity and dominance. I suggest you begin by urinating on her back porch and in the general area next to the wind chimes. If the testosterone level is low, your neighbor may not notice you have marked her property - especially with her being elderly and infirmed. If making with urine does not work, you next need to rip down her wind chimes and drop your scat on top of her ripped down wind chimes. If this doesn’t prove to be effective, I would suggest you take a few days off from work and monitor how people come and go from her property. When she is alone and home, remove a couple of her fence boards, break into her back door and strike her repeatedly with a claw hammer while she sleeps and set her house aflame and leave for a late lunch.
The only way to deal with this lady is to fight fire with fire.. Get these and put them as close as possible to her house. Its the only way...
