This is the internal dialogue that I'm talking about. You're not the only ones who go through this. I heard that in life, if you want to be good at something, practice it constantly and you will master it. In your case my friend, just practice asking girls out and stop that internal dialogue and sooner rather then later, you'll be giving out advice to the other young lads. Do it man!
lol no I get that. I make it a rule to only go for girls that people would think are out of my league. And its not like I'm some gremlin looking MFer lol. I consider myself an average looking dude. But its different for some reason with this girl. She's got me questioning every move I make.
JMad it's more then the physical appearance. We all have known beautiful women on the outside, but inside, are horrible, and thus diminishing their beauty and in fact just making them ugly. You have said that this girl you're interested in is great and you're friends with her. This is very important. Another thing that I wanted to point out from your initial post. You mentioned that the girls on your team were suggesting/joking that you should ask her out. That she was joking to you about it as well (asking her out) and then you said and I quote, "she also amped up how friendly she was with me, started FLIRTING a bit". My friend, it appears that everyone around you can see that you should ask her out (including this girl). Before you miss your opportunity with her, just go up and say, "listen it looks like everyone thinks we should go out and to be honest with you I'd love to see if there's something more between us then our friendship. Would you be open to going out with me and see where this takes us? No matter what happens we will always be friends, but life is too short and it's hard to find someone you really connect with". This way she knows you're not talking about just hanging out as friends. Then look her directly in the eyes, smile, and say, "Cindy (or whatever her name is) I am asking you out right now on a date, are you free this weekend"? Then shut up and listen to what she says. If she already has plans for that weekend ask her if the following weekend is good? If she's interested you'll be able to tell and she'll give a day that will work. If she's waffling just ask her, "Cindy what are your thoughts with this, are you comfortable with this"? If she's making excuse after excuse just say, "Cindy, we're friends, and friends can be honest with one another, what thoughts are running through your mind right now. I like you and I'd love to go out with you, but if you have reservations about this let me know"? Then listen to what she has to say. IMO I think she'll say yes and if she doesn't no biggie. Either way you'll feel great for stepping out there and NOT letting fear keep you from taking action. Again quit over thinking this. The clock is ticking on your opportunity. Do this in person, not through a text or on the phone.
As others have mentioned, there is no such thing as someone "being out of your league". People in general are more alike than we are different. We put attractive members of the opposite sex on a pedestal, which is alright because it give you a goal to achieve, but if you just show some confidence and joke around a little you can get her! Also, be awkward on purpose! Girls dig it if you're like "hey..so you're kinda neat. Let's go get dinner after the game", something to that effect. Be goofy but not creepy. Good luck bruh
Here's what works for me in general circumstances in life, where I am having second thoughts or wavering for some reason(s) - confidence, resources, etc. Ask yourself: Will it affect you 100 years from now? Generally, it won't, whatever you decided to do. So why waver and over think? Seize the day and the situation. It won't matter later but you may get the reward NOW. Reading that you have already started the ball rolling, this is just a belated rejoinder, FWIW.
Sorry, but this girl just isn't into you. She knows you're interested and she's doing enough to keep you at bay because she likes the attention. You're helping her stroke her own post-break up ego.
I haven't read the entire thread (how did I miss it?), but would like to give my opinion, OP. Ask her out. I've been in a fantastic relationship probably for longer than you've been alive, but that wasn't always the case. I remember one instance I regret that goes back to 1971. I had met an Australian chick in Amsterdam and we got along great. I'm not a shy person at all, but for some reason I hesitated to put a move on her. Well, she ends up telling me she's got a flight to catch after a few days of having a great time hanging out, so I offered to go to Schiphol with her, the city's huge airport. When she had to board, I kissed her, which turned into something that lasted a minute or two. They announce the jet boarding again and she had to go. Know what she said? "Why didn't you do that yesterday? I would have stayed in Amsterdam." Regret can be a b****. If you don't give her a serious shot, you'll regret it. I moved on and met someone else, a Dutch girl I fell for, but all these years later, I still remember the kiss at the airport.
Sorry for not updating! I totally forgot lol We went out last week. Ill never understand girls like this one lol. She seemed excited when I asked her, but barely talked during the date. It was super weird. No hard feelings towards her but I'm not gonna ask her out again. It was just too weird, plus it looks like I might be moving this summer so it'd be dumb to pursue anything with someone where I currently live. And she knows that so I doubt she expects anything from me. Hope to still be friends but I'm over the possibility of anything else. Thanks again for all the responses! This girl was super confusing, if I knew then what I know now I probably wouldn't have asked her out. But not knowing would have been worse.
The thing you should take away from this is that you took action and asked her out. So it doesn't appear it will work out moving forward. Big deal. Hopefully you gained some confidence and the courage to ask the next girl out that you're interested in. The more you do this the easier it gets.
