What age range? I imagine for the very young that just about everyone tells their kids to be kind, generous, share, etc. Then as they get older it gets more nuanced with respect to your needs vs others' needs.
They should be taught to be thoughtful and considerate of others while protecting their own interests first. The reason for this is because while kindness goes a long way, in the end it's a dog eat dog world. You can't let others take from you or you run the risk of becoming a bitter, hateful person as a result. On the other hand, if you sufficiently take care of yourself, you are afforded the ability to take care of others as you wish which can make you a happier and better person.
Be as kind and courteous to others when you have no stake in the game. When it's your money on the line, there's no greater advocate than yourself.
I find that, although there are times when both can be achieved, most time, they are exclusive - you must choose one or the other.
The 2nd one. Don't let anyone, including you, take away your thoughtfulness and kindness to yourself. It's an unreliable world and you will be tempted, but learn to recognize it and stay strong.
I've taught both to my son and he has a well-defined sense of right and wrong. However, life is too situational to always choose one over the other. Wisdom and common sense steer the wheel between the two.
At a younger age the former, introduce the later as they grow older. The later at an early age would be more detrimental. Can't function in society as a prick, if you're an ******* you at least need to be able to fake kindness every now and then.
Put your own interests first without being an *******. First option is naive, second option you are an *******.
I'm not a parent, but I think kids should eventually learn both the first and second options. However like others said, they're not mutually exclusive, and you can put your own interests first while also having empathy and consideration for others. Ideally, a young person would be taught (and perhaps more importantly and accurately, learn from hands-on life experience) how to be a good judge of character. That way, he or she would (in most cases) know when to prioritize the first option, when to heavily prioritize the second option, and when it's sensible to be both.
Second one - the the two ARE mutually exclusive. Children need to be self aware. They need to know what is harmful to them, and they need to know how to garuntee their immediate safety. Think about yourself first and then consider others.
Both. You can worry about yourself while being kind to others. I think there's an age range though. Very early on, you try to get kids to be nice just so they're not bullying everyone on the playground. But when they get older, I think it's OK to teach them to be mindful of their own stuff. It's a cruel world out there, and once you start getting in situations where teachers aren't there all the time, you have to have them be prepared to look out for themselves.
Ideally, kids will learn to approach life with the idea that being kind and considerate to others is ultimately in their long-term self interest as well. Maybe not economically, but as a means of attaining personal happiness. I think when kids are young, its important to emphasize social skills like being kind, considerate, and cooperative. As they grow older and more independent, teach them about how to be self-reliant and not allow themselves to be taken advantage of.
It depends. Do you want the world to have a chance at becoming a better place, or would you rather see things continue to nose dive and go to shiit?
