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First time telling a girl that I like her..and friendzoned..

Discussion in 'BBS Hangout' started by ClutchCity3, Jan 14, 2013.

  1. ClutchCity3

    ClutchCity3 Member

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    well...at least I'm still 19...

    She has been a great friend of mine for more than a year now, she was really caring, but she was just being nice as she has said.

    Should I still be her friend or not? I'm leaning toward to avoid her in the campus as much as I can, and stay cool when I see her.

    I thought she is the one......anyhow..just gotta move on I guess...so stupid of me telling her about my feeling.

    Educate me Clutchfans! Sorry for my grammar error btw.
     
  2. The Real Shady

    The Real Shady Contributing Member

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    Find her best friend and sleep with her.
     
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  3. London'sBurning

    London'sBurning Contributing Member

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    You're 19. Go and have fun.
     
  4. CaptainRox

    CaptainRox Member

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  5. Svpernaut

    Svpernaut Contributing Member

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    The best way to win the affection of a lady, is be completely indifferent to her. The pickup artists are right, and it does work to "neg" chicks to win them over.

    As far as the friend zone goes, if you want to flip it around you can. Openly date other chicks and bring them around her, and when you do act like you are having a blast with this other chick.

    It can also be successful reversed. Tell her in a few weeks that she was right, and you're glad you never escalated it... if you have another chick at the time, you can say that you'd never have met this amazing chick, blah blah blah.

    The LAST thing you want to do is openly try to win her affection.

    http://www.reddit.com/r/seduction
     
  6. TexasTofu

    TexasTofu Member

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    gotta get your reps
     
  7. htownrox1

    htownrox1 Member

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    Definitely remove yourself from her. It's gonna be hella awkward and your still gonna be attracted to her so its best to have limited contact.
     
  8. ClutchCity3

    ClutchCity3 Member

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    Forgot to mention that I have been two relationships already...it's not like I'm that desperate for A girl...it's just THIS girl.
     
  9. QdoubleA

    QdoubleA Member

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    Chicks want what they can't have. Move on and she'll either start to want the D, or you will have found new fresh soil to grow your crops. Either way, like everyone else said YOU'RE NINETEEN! Enjoy it, trust us.


    By enjoy it, we mean go put the wood to as many college girls as you can, you have a lifetime to be in a serious committed relationship.
     
  10. robbie380

    robbie380 ლ(▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿ლ)
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    What do you mean friend zoned? Are you not confident enough to pursue her? Or is she not attracted to you? Try not to build everything up so much to where you are thinking one girl is "the one". It's hard...I've been there back when I was younger, but you just have to try to take a step back and realize there are more girls out there.
     
  11. TheRealist137

    TheRealist137 Member

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    leave her and forget about her.
     
  12. RV6

    RV6 Contributing Member

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    You could have 20 previous relationships and you'd still not have much of an advantage over someone with one or two at that age.

    You're likely going to change as you get older, especially around your mid 20s. The kind of girls you want know may not be the kind you want later. This means they will change too in their 20s, so you may find yourself a nice quiet girl and she can become a go go dancer at 22 who loves attention, or vice versa.

    As you mature, which probably won't fully happen until, you guessed it, your mid 20s, you won't be able to really put all your experiences together and make some real sense out of them to figure out what is best for you.
     
  13. Ricksmith

    Ricksmith Contributing Member

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    People want what they can't have. You can still be friends with her, but I would distance myself. You're in college, have fun. Just be positive about everything, act like nothing ever happened and move on. Rejection is a part of life and it's better to know her answer than to just keep it to yourself for months and months like some people.

    Look at it this way: You had the balls to tell her. You took a shot, but no one bats 1.000. Some guys can't pull the trigger, and live life in the friend zone.
     
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  14. Svpernaut

    Svpernaut Contributing Member

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    This. Also, stop being the nice guy. I "put the p***y on a pedestal" for far too long when I was younger. Once I realized that being the nice guy didn't help, it worked wonders for my self confidence. I'm not saying be an *******, just that women respond more to confidence and cockiness than they do outpourings of affection. Every woman will deny this of course, but I've field tested it.
     
  15. CCorn

    CCorn Member

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    Ignore her.
     
  16. Svpernaut

    Svpernaut Contributing Member

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    If he'd like to pursue her, I wouldn't flat out ignore her.

    He needs to bring up his value in her eyes.

    <iframe width="560" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/QZuOKUrwoys" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

    In all seriousness though. If he spurns her, she is going to resent him because she was "honest" and he didn't "understand" or accept her honesty. I'd remain in contact as you normally would while continuing to increase his worth in her eyes. Thus enter the dating others in front of her, telling her she was right while he's dating someone else, etc. If other women want him, and he doesn't want her... she'll begin to ask "why?"
     
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  17. ClutchCity3

    ClutchCity3 Member

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    I told her that I like her and she said that it's better that we are just friends.
     
  18. robbie380

    robbie380 ლ(▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿ლ)
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    Yeah it's kind of stupid, but it really is true. Girls are like moths to a flame for cocky guys who they think they can fix. I can't really act cocky, but just being confident in yourself is what matters. That said it took me a long time to get self confidence.
     
  19. Deckard

    Deckard Blade Runner
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    You're 19, and that was the first time you told a chick that you like her, OP? You need to seriously practice telling girls that you like them (if I misunderstood you, my apologies!). Have a passing acquaintance with someone that you find atractive, but haven't thought about in "that way?" Tell her you like her. Chat her up. Heck, she might surprise you and be willing to go out. Doesn't work? Try, try again. You'll be surprised. It will get easier to do with repetition.

    A very good friend of mine, who's divorced, middle aged, and always looking for female companionship (usually with women 20 years younger than he is), even if just for the evening (or especially just for the evening, although he's capable of having long relationships), has the philosophy that you chat up every chick in a bar, or club, or even in the supermarket that seems unattached (at the moment) and that you find attractive. Sheer numbers will be in your favor, unless your appearance is just one nose hair short of horrific. The guy isn't that attractive himself. Think Hoss Cartwright on Bonanza (which was before your time, unless you caught the reruns on cable). What he has going for him is a charismatic personality, and he's highly educated. He can talk about anything. And he has no fear when it comes to women. His attitude is that the better looking they are, the more worthwhile the attempt, even if an onlooker would think that she is way out of his league. My friend has amazing luck. I've seen him in action, because he likes to have a wingman, and since I'm happily attached, and older than he is, I'm perfect.

    Give it a shot for a few weeks. What have you got to lose? The worst thing that can happen is that they say no.
     
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  20. robbie380

    robbie380 ლ(▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿ლ)
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    Yeah forget her. Tell her it was nice knowing her and move on. It sounds like she isn't attracted to you.

    In the future, don't build stuff up so much. If you are attracted to a girl take her out to dinner and movies and make a move on her. Girls are stupid with the "friend" stuff.
     

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