Paraphrased from the Daily Show, last night:
Jon Stewart speaking to his correspondant in Florida:
Jon Stewart: Do you see this thing coming to a close any time soon?
Correspondant: Well Jon, let's just say that like many of it's residents, the state of Florida is cruising down the middle of the freeway at 5 miles an hour with it's left turn signal on. This could take a while.
Have you heard any other good lines?