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(advice) my friend is killing himself with meth.

Discussion in 'BBS Hangout' started by Chamillionaire, Jul 14, 2010.

  1. Chamillionaire

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    not sure how appropriate this is but i don`t know what to do nor if i should be doing anything at all. here`s the summary.

    i`ve known the guy my whole life. great guy, but comes from a messed up home. his mom used to sell meth in california, and the father`s whereabouts are unknown. apparently, he was a biker. his brother was is in his early 30`s and has spent over half of his life behind bars in california.

    my friend joined the marines at 18. no diploma, but a GED. he gets out, falls in love. they break up, his heart is crushed. he starts using. this is at least 10 years ago. then he starts the downward spiral. he loses his job, starts losing lifelong friends doing god knows what.

    i move away, only to get in touch with him maybe a year ago. i hear he`s been using and that things have been really unstable for him in every sense of the word. he was dating a "call-girl". she used too. so she comes home a few days ago with 3 other guys. one of them being a 6 foot 3 latino dood in his dads cobra (JK). he flips out and ends up leaving his w**** girlfriend.

    he is now in austin, detoxing. so he says. we are chatting on FB and he`s very short with his answers. sounding very pessimistic about life. my friends tell me he`s got track marks all up and down his arms. *barf*

    i tell him to go to NA. look up the phone number and the web site for him. then he says, "i`ll check it out." then gets off line abruptly, probably sick and tired of hearing my crap.

    was i right to help the guy? do i look the other way because i`ve been more fortunate to have not been into what he`s into? this guy is like my brother, at least i thought.
     
    1 person likes this.
  2. moestavern19

    moestavern19 Member

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    He needs somebody who cares enough about him to drag his ass to rehab.
     
  3. Chamillionaire

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    he`s going to die if he keeps going at this pace. nobody will help him because he`s pretty much alienated himself from everybody that actually gave a damn. now, he doesn`t have a job, a home, nor hope and he`s shooting up to cope.

    what am i supposed to do?
     
  4. SwoLy-D

    SwoLy-D Contributing Member

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    Man... that's seriously messed up... you're using the tick " ` " and not the apostrophe " ' " . :eek: Really messed up.
     
  5. moestavern19

    moestavern19 Member

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    He feels he needs it, he feels nobody understands that he needs it. He feels like everyone hates him and is judging him.

    He'll be dead soon if someone doesn't intervene.


    He needs serious help.
     
  6. Chamillionaire

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    man, i tried. i told me to go to NA because it`s free. i think rehabs cost an arm and a leg IIRC. i looked up it up for him and everything.

    how am i supposed to talk him into going? by just pushing it in his face? i know he doesn`t like that **** and will probably distance himself from me as well.
     
  7. Mr. Brightside

    Mr. Brightside Contributing Member

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    How is he like a brother, if you have only recently had contact with him after so many years? For rehab to work, he needs to have the will to be there. Not just other people forcing him too. Most people need to hit rock bottom before they seek help.
     
  8. Gooshie

    Gooshie Member

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    This is a more serious problem than posters on a message board can help with. If you handle it wrong he could remove you from his life altogether and you'll lose your chance to help.

    I'd ask a professional for advice/help if you want to actually get involved. If he's been doing this stuff for 10 years and losing friends over it, chances are he's already heard the things you're saying to him.
     
  9. Tree-Mac

    Tree-Mac Contributing Member

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    So he started his downward spiral all because some girl dumped him. Some people take relationships to the extreme, and even commit suicide if they break up. So what I suggest is you try to hook him up with some girl and only that girl will be able to get him out of this mess.

    Life went downhill with breakup from a girl, life will go uphill with a girl.
     
  10. moestavern19

    moestavern19 Member

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    You can have him hate your guts for the next few weeks while you force him to get help, or you can lose him for good.

    If nobody else will do it, it falls on you sadly
     
  11. KeepKenny

    KeepKenny Contributing Member

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    Since he served in the military, the VA should have some rehab programs for him.
     
  12. leroy

    leroy Contributing Member

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    I agree with this other than the last part. Ultimately, it's on his friend to get the help he needs and it's no one else's fault but his own if he doesn't.
     
  13. OmegaSupreme

    OmegaSupreme Contributing Member

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    ^^^that. if he refuses, cut him off. only he can decide how low of a bottom he wants to have. there's really no excuse if keepkenny's suggestion above is available. there's a lot of folks w/o medical benefits that have sobered up in a lot worse conditions.
     
  14. moestavern19

    moestavern19 Member

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    Yes, without question, there has to be some part of him willing to admit he needs help... if there isn't, than it may already be too late.
     
  15. Bandwagoner

    Bandwagoner Contributing Member

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    If he was active in the USMC he can go to the VA.
     
  16. juicystream

    juicystream Contributing Member

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    Drug users have to be dragged to rehab. Unfortunately the only way to keep him there is to have the court order him into rehab. I'm not sure what you can do beyond offering to take him.
     
  17. Ottomaton

    Ottomaton Contributing Member
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    This is pretty much how someone who stops taking meth is going to act for like 6 months - easily annoyed, terse, sleepy and slightly depressed.

    If he was talking your ear off about how great the NA would be and how much he was going to change, and what a great friend you were, to the point that you had to practically hang up, that would be him on drugs.
     
  18. TRIQSTER

    TRIQSTER Contributing Member

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    Intervention
     
  19. SuperBeeKay

    SuperBeeKay Member

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    Sounds like meth is one hell of a drug
     
  20. bejezuz

    bejezuz Contributing Member

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    Good luck, but the odds are not in your favor. Don't ever loan him money or put him in a position where he can steal from you. I have a cousin doing 35 years in state pen over meth. There are no worse drugs out there.
     

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