Going through mine right now (40 y.o.). Not happy with my life or my job. Thinking of quitting, going back to Houston and starting over, whatever that means. Whenever the **** hits the fan, I always think to myself "go back home!!".
I can relate to that. What sparked me was that I got screwed over at my job. I'm in pursuit of happiness.
Probably when I was 23 and moved here to Houston. I went from a fast paced job to a sedentary job, gained weight, got depressed, realized everything I grew up believing was a joke. My relationship started to deteriorate. I lost my job and the only woman I ever loved on the same day. When those two things finally ended I was a new being, able to figure myself out somewhat. Then I met a female version of myself, a person who would help bring me back from the radicalization of my newfound free spirit. I needed to be grounded in reality. I needed disicpline and structure, but the routine things have always been the hardest for me. I'm 28 and still have no career, no single ambition but rather hundreds of possibilities. I can't decide where to go. I fear I will always be on the outside looking in until they dope me up good.
Hit me when I was 40. Hit me like a freight train, too. I kept thinking, "Are my best days behind me?! When I'm in my fifties, it's going to be difficult and very improbable for me to get in good shape and accomplish some of the other things I want to do in life. When my mom died the following year at 68 years old, my feelings were compounded. The same for when my Dad died earlier this year at 69 years old. I still have the feelings and am trying to deal with them as best as I can.
I think mid-life crisis only happens when you're in a rut/routine that you're bored with. Not bored and never have been = no mid-life crisis.
I think midlife crises arise from existential angst, which itself often arises when one realizes he is at a tipping point of having less life ahead of him than he has lived already and that his quality of life, however good, is unlikely to become better in future years and is more likely to become worse in various ways. There are, of course, exceptions. You are apparently one that can distract himself sufficiently by keeping yourself from becoming bored; my dog is good at this also. You are one of the lucky ones that is unfazed by his approaching mortality or is in great enough denial of it that it's not a problem. This is a lucky way to be. But mid-life crises are not typically a matter of boredom; they are far more often a natural and rational response to the reality of our situation as mortal beings.
It isn't nearly that simple. You will understand when you are old enough to experience it or have friends who do.
Are you an economist?-you weigh these issues everyday, but you discovered money is just paper, an experience lasts a life time. I'm have not got there yet, well I hope shoot! I'm in my lateish 20's
What ever it is....pills are are NOT the answer. Live everyday with a goal in mind, no matter how small. Think about the present, and realize that everyone's going to die someday. Focus on what you have, want, and like...Not on what you don't have, don't want, and don't like. Spoiler <iframe width="420" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/xfq_A8nXMsQ" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>
Thanks for the short-sighted "wisdom," Tom Cruise. When it comes to disease or disorder, though they may be prescribed too often otherwise, pills are often the difference between life and death. You're spreading dangerous misinformation. You should stop doing that.
Thanks for the ticket, internet police. I should do what I want to do, and people should listen if they find something valid in what I'm saying. That's all. There's a difference in providing an opinion (perhaps too strongly stated for your taste) and telling people what they should or shouldn't do. Did I say to avoid medicine? All I'm getting at is you won't find the truth in life at the bottom of a xanax or prozac bottle.
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calling it a mid-life crisis is a bit of a hyperbole. it was more of an a-ha moment. not sure what being an economist has to do with it. anyhow, i took inventory of my stuff. the 1800 sq ft home that sits on 2/3rds of an acre. the 3 bedrooms, 2 baths, 4 televisions, 3 PCs, etc. it's only two of us living here. i know how lucky i am to have all these things but what was the point? honestly, it was all for show, status, to be cool. hey, look at me. i've made it because i can buy ****. then i realized how looking cool was making me miserable. **** looking cool, be happy. i spent my weekends doing yardwork, cleaning stuff in the house i never use, or repairing an appliance. Things literally suck the energy out of you. to me, it's not a way to live.
Did anyone else just imagine Bolo Yeung mowing his lawn, ironing his wifebeaters, and fixing up his spice rack after reading this?
First you said this. Then I said that was not always true. Then you asked this. I answer you this. Yes. Look back at your prior post (or just at my quoting of you in this post) in case your memory has failed you.
Incidentally, though I agree with this comment above, are you suggesting there is some other place to find "the truth in life?" If so, you are either crazy from religion or you are simply crazy. Prozac and other psychiatric medications aren't indicated for "finding the truth in life." They are indicated, almost always in conjunction with talk therapy, to treat serious medical conditions. Are you against medicine and doctors completely? Do you believe only in faith healing? Or are you just making the distinction that disorders of mood or mind are less serious than disorders of the body? Because if that's what you're trying to say, you could not be more wrong.
I disagree since I think culture plays a huge part instead of a natural response. I had an edifying conversation with a fisherman who lived in a very low-HDI country. He couldn't understand the 'angst' of needing a check-list of materials to own and feats to accomplish, competing in a rat race, and being afraid of death. A roof over his head, food to eat, people to love, and a soccer ball was all he needed, he said. I'm fascinated with this phenomenon because I mostly see it in people living in the West/Global North. Those I know who don't live in the former that do suffer midlife crises tend to be those who embrace Western culture: writers, journalists, and thespians who don't believe in an after-life. However, there are some Muslims and Hindus in name only (their words) that also have midlife crises which hints that personal beliefs can't be discounted too much. For instance, I live in the West and embrace some aspects of its culture while rejecting others like materialism and hedonism because of my faith; neither I nor my family that think like me have experienced a midlife crisis. A combination of culture and (a bit of) personal beliefs predicts midlife crises rather than something humans around the world experience, I think.
