[work advice] Facing bullying, should I stay at my current job?

DeVry offers civil engineering degrees?

You're Asian?

Why you no go to Harvard or Yale?

You know Karate... Use it.

 

Honestly...this is the kind of stuff that should have stopped in high school. I believe you can also call corporate and complain about this and they will do something about it. This is a make or break situation actually....bullies like this can make or break you...if you don't want to call corporate, I suggest you say dumb things to insult him too, or shrug it off with a smile and call him a bad name. Try to adapt and show you can deal with jerks like this. But seriously..this is something you don't need to deal with and you can call corporate. Don't just quit for something as small as this.

 

Wait I just read it again and you said it stopped yet it still bothers you...? Man that's kind of strange.. in that case, I suggest you attend a church and try to clear out the heaviness you feel within you.

 

Document every instance with the date and time and what he says, especially the racist stuff. I would even include other people who are around when he says this stuff. After you have some documentation, take it to HR. Let them handle it. He's creating a hostile work environment which is affecting productivity.

 

It's karma for all the bad BBS posting.

 

There isn't an HR based on his description of the company.

Go work someplace else. If you can't get over it after 5 months, you aren't going to. If he hadn't stopped, I'd understand your post, but he stopped a long time ago.

 

Its simple: We kill the douchebag.

 

he doesnt seem very alpha, just insecure.

stand up for yourself.

 

A new job would be a short term fix. It sounds like you really need to speak with a professional. With the drinking, smoking, depression, and lasting effects that guy caused, its easy to see that you have some underlying issues that you need to work out.

Hopefully you have health insurance with this job and can afford to speak with a counselor or doctor who specializes in helping patients talk through their issues. You'll be a better person for it.

Good luck.

 

He stopped and it's still bothering you to that level? Sounds like it's spinning in your head and body. Get some physical exercise, do some yoga, mindfulness training, meditation. It's a great opportunity to get to know yourself and you'll be better for it. If none of that help, seeks professional help.

 

First, no it isn't appropriate or right for him to have acted the way he did. To him it probably was all a joke but it wasn't to you and it is obvious that it did bother you and still does. HOWEVER, at this point he has stopped and it has been a long enough period of time (5 months) that it isn't just a coincidence and it is unlikely he does it again.
You said you get along with everyone else, and that the aggressor now leaves you alone. At this point it is on you. There is nothing more that can happen. They are not going to fire someone for something that happened months ago. I appreciate you being loyal to the man that believed in you enough to give you an opportunity. I suggest you talk to friends and family about it and see if you can work out your feelings. This has nothing to do with Bigtexxx and everything to do with inside of you. Just look at it like this, your former bully hasn't bullied you in almost half a year but is still dominating your thoughts and emotions... don't give him that sort of power.

 

I empathize with you, but I don't think this coworker really thinks he is being racist, but rather just messing with you locker room style in an all guy's environment.

You just have to roll with the punches and make reference to some silly stereotypes about white people. For example ask him where he takes his Klan robes for laundry, or if he is thinking about killing himself since he can't fly the Confederate flag anymore. Things like that. Not too serious, but playful back and forth that usually will make you part of the team.

If you can show that you can take a joke and dish it back to him or anyone things will get a lot better so much faster.

 

Get another job. Your obligation to be loyal to your boss ended when he failed to stop the racist harassment at work.

You could take it to the point of a lawsuit at work for hostile work environment, but it's a huge drain and I would jus be the bigger man and walk.

This bully will get checked at some point in life, but he will just move on and do it somewhere else. Which leads me to my next point.

Guys (and women) like this are everywhere in life. In fact, something like 80% of workplace bullying comes from the supervisor. You are going to have to figure out how to deal with it eventually. You can either roll with the punches and come back at the new bully (I suggest momma jokes). Or you will have to move on, every time.

Good luck, man. Crappy situation but overall you're employed and getting experience. I wouldn't mention ANY of this to anyone at your next job. Just get a fresh start.

 

Yeah, this. He stopped because you are no fun to roast because you don't roast back. I don't think he was the steal your lunch money bully.

 

I doubt you would get much sympathy from anyone in your company if you explained the scenario. As I understand your situation....

Started job
Got bullied
Finally confronted the guy in December
Stopped for a bit
Apparently started again
Completely stopped in February
Five months bullying free

Considering it still bothers you after five months, you should probably go receive professional counseling.

 

Find out where he lives...

Spoiler

 

Bro, you are very sensitive. You are taking this too serious. Roasting is a part of our nature. Your insecurities is whats killing you.

 

And you think it is possible that the supervisor told the dude to just layoff you a bit? He may have seemed like he didn't care, but it would be easy to tell dude to layoff if they have a good relationship like you say.

 

File an HR report.

Go up the chain.

DD