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The WB and thier latest scheme to screw up Superman

Discussion in 'BBS Hangout' started by Oski2005, Jan 28, 2004.

  1. Oski2005

    Oski2005 Contributing Member

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    http://www.aintitcool.com/display.cgi?id=16896

    :eek: :eek:

    The Latest Series of Disasters To Plague SUPERMAN!
    Hey folks, Harry here... Ok, you probably caught the news that was spreading like wildfire back around the time of that Fangoria Convention, where Selma Blair stated that she was "THIS CLOSE" to signing on to become Lois Lane. Ahhhh, things seemed so correct back then. A quality dramatic actress that completely looked like Lois Lane has always looked. There was much jubilation.
    Last night, I got on the phone with a friend of mine that sweeps up around the Warner Lot and is 100% reliable, and I was asking my typical questions, like... How Bad Is Catwoman Going To Suck? and he would laugh and say that it is a freight train of sh*t without brakes. And on a lark I said, "Heard anything about SUPERMAN?" And there was silence.
    "Hello..."
    I heard a cough, "Well, it ain't Selma Blair anymore." I expressed my utter disappointment, and countered with asking who it was, "Beyonce Knowles." I was kinda silent for a bit. "Have you heard who's playing Lex Luthor?" he asked me. "No" -- That's when he says, "Johnny Depp." Aaaaaah F**K!
    Ok, can you see what's happening here. They're not making the great SUPERMAN movie, they're making the hip and pop and garbage version. I love Johnny Depp, but he's wrong for Lex Luthor. Lex doesn't need to be funny or quirky. He needs to be calculating, charming and cold. Somebody like a shaved headed version of Ralph Fiennes. And Lois Lane, you don't throw away nearly 70 years of programming that Lois Lane is a small lithe brunette that wears wonderous buisness suits. Beyonce is COMPLETELY WRONG FOR THE PART! You need an actress, not a ****ing PEPSI COMMERCIAL POP TART!
    Great. So we're gonna get a great Christopher Nolan BATMAN movie, and a ****ty SUPERMAN movie. ****ing great. Assholes.
    This is Lois Lane - coming August 2004 from DC DIRECT!

    [​IMG]

    Meanwhile, Jr Mintz was pouring through her brother's comic collection and came up with this... Maybe this is how Warner Brothers came up with this BRILLIANT idea!

    [​IMG]
     
  2. AntiSonic

    AntiSonic Member

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    Depp way too young. Look on the bright side, at least Eminem wasn't in the running. ;)

    As for Beyonce, haven't seen much of her acting, but Kingpin's race swap in Daredevil didn't cause too big a stir did it?
     
  3. mrpaige

    mrpaige Contributing Member

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    I never thought about Selma Blair, but now that she's mentioned, she does have a Lois Lane kind-of thing going on.

    I like Beyonce and all, but she doesn't exactly scream "Lois Lane" to me.

    I have given up hope that anyone at WB knows how to make movies rather than 'packaged marketing events'.
     
  4. edc

    edc Contributing Member

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    You believe a rumor about "the next Superman movie?"

    Go watch "An Evening with Kevin Smith." I'll wait

    [...] [...] [...] [yeah, it's a long f'ing DVD] [...] [...] [...]

    Good. Feeling better about what (if anything) we will finally get? :)

    The stupid thing is, the fans would be happy with Michael Rosenbaum and Tom Welling from "Smallville" and a good story...like a slimmed down version of the KS "Superman Lives" script.
     
  5. Oski2005

    Oski2005 Contributing Member

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    I've seen it, can't wait to see how they put a giant spider into the new Superman movie.

    I don't care about race swapping either, but it has to work. Like for Kingpin, is there even a white guy out there who could be as imposing and is a good actor like my man MCD? He was the best and only guy for that roll. Too bad the rest of the movie sucked, he was freaking awesome and it'd be nice if he could spill over into a Spider-Man movie.

    Beyonce is a whole other story. They might as well cast Jay-Z as Superman.

    I hope this movie bombs though, if there was ever an excuse for just razing the current management at Warner Bros, this could be it. Also, if Superman fails, then maybe the comic book industry will stop trying to squeeze every penny they can out of their property and we won't get movies about characters like the Sub Mariner or Namor.
     
  6. HAYJON02

    HAYJON02 Contributing Member

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    Warner Brothers sucks? There's a newsflash.

    I feel your pain. When are they gonna get it that you need more than looks to be a good actor? They keep screwing up over and over and over... BEYONCE????

    Disgraceful
     
  7. AMS

    AMS Contributing Member

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    As hot as Beyonce is, WTF???????

    IM NOT WATCHING THIS MOVIE IF BEZYONCE IS STARRING...
    Even JLO ;) would have been better



    Actually my vote would have been Jennifer Aniston
     
  8. super_mario

    super_mario Member

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    Johnny Depp is 40 years old.
     
  9. Master Baiter

    Master Baiter Contributing Member

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    40 is still too young
     
  10. droxford

    droxford Member

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    In related sucky news...

    The Superman movie will be directed by Joseph McGinty Mitchell (aka McG), the same guy who directed "Charlie's Angels" and "Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle".

    (this is according to IMDB)
    http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0348150/

    This superman movie is gonna really really suck.

    -- droxford
     
  11. Manny Ramirez

    Manny Ramirez The Music Man

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    I thought Namor WAS the Sub Mariner.:confused:

    Oh and yeah this movie will definitely suck with Depp, Beyonce, and mrpaige's favorite director of all-time in McG!:p ;)
     
  12. Hippieloser

    Hippieloser Contributing Member

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    Wait... the Sub-Mariner OR Namor? I thought Namor WAS the Sub-Mariner. And he's ALWAYS sucked.

    Crap, how do I know this garbage?

    Oh well. Maybe we'll get a Silver Surfer movie at some point, too. :eek: :cool:
     
  13. Hippieloser

    Hippieloser Contributing Member

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    Aw, you suck Manny.
     
  14. tierre_brown

    tierre_brown Contributing Member

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    Holy f*ck that movie is going to suck a big one...too bad it'll still probably gross a freaking insane amount after the unwitting public is trapped by the popular star power that is Beyonce...
     
  15. mrpaige

    mrpaige Contributing Member

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    BTW, here's Harry today:

    Disaster Averted! Stupidity Passes! SUPERMAN in much better shape today than yesterday!

    Hey folks, Harry here... Ok, since yesterday I've been getting tons of feedback from folks in regards to the Beyonce Knowles / Lois Lane debacle. Seems that McG had decided he wanted to go with Beyonce, nothing official had been signed at that point, HOWEVER, agents of other actresses that were up for the part, their agencies, a few secretaries and assistants here and there all heard that the part was no longer available and was going to Beyonce.
    THAT is no longer the case today. Today, according to a plethora of sources, the part of Lois Lane is WIDE-OPEN and the line being spread was that Beyonce was, of course, never going to be Lois Lane, but rather... ahem... that was just a really bad idea that was being floated, and... ahem... of course Warner Brothers would... ahem... never do that, because of course they respect the source material and it's long and valued history... ahem...

    So, that part is still open and actresses are still trying to get that wonderful part... but not Beyonce.

    In regards to Johnny Depp and Lex Luthor, I have heard no additional information one way or another. He is an incredibly talented actor that could most likely play anything under the sun, but in a million years I never would have seen him as Lex... but in a million years, I never could have imagined Capt Jack Sparrow or his Hunter S Thompson.

    I will continue to keep my eye on this project... and feel free to believe or not believe as your cynical mind is likely to do... but a Pepsi Pop Tart has been rejected, let's just hope they get a damn fine actress for the role now.
     
  16. Manny Ramirez

    Manny Ramirez The Music Man

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    :D
     
  17. Oski2005

    Oski2005 Contributing Member

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    My fault, I meant to say the Sub Mariner or Namor (or whatever his name is) and then add another few names like Plastic Man. Must have been distracted last night.


    Also, just read this as I was typing, the latest is that Beyonce isn't in, but McDumbass really wanted her, just incase you weren't sold on the stupidty of McSh*thead.

    Beyonce Knowles No Longer Lois Lane? Source: Ain't-It-Cool-News Thursday, January 29, 2004

    Ain't-It-Cool-News claims to have an update on the Superman casting we reported on yesterday...

    Seems that McG had decided he wanted to go with Beyonce, nothing official had been signed at that point, HOWEVER, agents of other actresses that were up for the part, their agencies, a few secretaries and assistants here and there all heard that the part was no longer available and was going to Beyonce. THAT is no longer the case today. Today, according to a plethora of sources, the part of Lois Lane is WIDE-OPEN and the line being spread was that Beyonce was, of course, never going to be Lois Lane...

    We'll see what happens, but it still looks like Johnny Depp is being eyed for Lex Luthor. Stay tuned!
     
  18. Batman Jones

    Batman Jones Contributing Member

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    Here you go, Oski. This oughtta make you feel better...

    http://superherohype.com/superman/index.php?id=761

    Big Batman and Superman Scoop?!
    Source: Leo K.
    Thursday, January 29, 2004

    This is the first time we've heard from 'Leo K.', but he may have just dropped a big scoop on our desks. We're going to tell you to take all of the following with a grain of salt, since we're not sure the scooper is reliable or not. Here's what we received...

    Ok new scooper here. I heard of this site through work and I would like to set the record straight-for BATMAN and a little for SUPERMAN. First.

    Johnny Depp? for Lex Luthor. Bit of missunderstanding. What is really happening is Depps NAME, i.e. he hasn't been contacted (in case you haven't noticed, he's going to be busy for quite a while...) is being circled for the role of Superman's father, Jor-el.

    Now onto BATMAN. First. The filming begins at the end of next month in Iceland and will continue until mid March before moving to the U.K. Iceland shooting-don't worry, it's not BATMAN on ice skates-more like all terrain vehicles, with Christian Bale not arriving till around March 1st. One of the cardington hangers being used for the film has large sets of a old train station of some sort, as well as housing the MASSIVE batcave.

    Casting. First of all, Morgan Freeman is no longer up for Lucious Fox, but is up for Gordon. Initially he was, but when Chris Cooper refused, Nolan turned to Freeman. Cillian Murphy will play Jonathan Crane, and Katie Homes as Harvey Dents assisstant Rachel. Harvey Dent has yet to be casted, having Guy Pearce be the only one test for that. The role of Earle has been brought up to several people, none of them rather big name stars, but lesser known character actors. Same goes for Boss Carime Falcone. Lucious Fox is also still undecided.

    I also happened to read the FALSE batmobile description you have. The car is still being made but is not like "monster truck". Rather it is dark black. If you have the lights shut off, you ain't seeing it. It has twin jet engines in the back, with two small fins over them. It is a two seater and has two tires on the front, that, if looking from the direct front of it, are about 8-10 inches inward compared to the back two, which are slightly larger, but not that noticable. The cars are all going to be equipped with a large variety of gizmos. The jets can burn so hot it creates thick black smoke, and oil slick, all wheel drive, bat hooks, bulletproof windshield, ejection seats, and a t.v.

    The costume-jet black as well. It is not spandex, under armor, or even rubber. It is a new material, that can stretch and bend easy, but won't be overly skin tight. Padding in the ribs and chest area as well as the arms and upper legs will be added, with large black boots for the feet. There will be about 4-5 of them.

    Batman MAY use other vehicles in the film...but I won't spoil that for you now. Oh and the press conference-lets just say your going to want to be staying in around the 17th (last I heard).


    Is any of this accurate? We don't know, 'Leo K.' didn't leave behind any contact information for us to find out. Nevertheless, one way to see if there's anything to it will be to see if the press conference is really taking place on the 17th - that might be one indication.
     
  19. Oski2005

    Oski2005 Contributing Member

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    :D :D :D
     

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