Predict Tonight's TNT Inside the NBA halftime show

All I know is that until the day Chuck retires from Inside the NBA, the Rockets are gonna get sh_t on.

Shaq: Barbeque chicken
Chuck: (mumbles something incoherent)
Kenny: (looks down at the desk)
Ernie: Laughs and does the highlights.

 

lmao "enrah" had me rolling

 

I stop watching the show since last season, well except that Shaq the fool part.

 

"Kenny this team don't play defense they gave up 108 tonight"-Charles
"But they scored 135, and since CP3 came back their defensive rating is number 1 in the league"-Ernie
"BBQ Chicken"-Shaq
"HAHAHA what they do Chuck, hats off to the shorthanded Jazz for putting up a gritty effort tonight"-Kenny
"I agree Kenny, Jerry Sloan is doing an excellent job coaching this team this year even though they have so many injuries"-Charles

 

Apply-Rinse-Repeat

1) Chuckles (Charles Barley) will take pop shots at the Rockets and Houston organization

2) Then Chuckie will sip on his coffee mug, while Heckle & Jeckle giggle like giddie school girls

3) Shaq will say Charles is right, that the Rockets are just a jump shooting team. Never mind
GSW & Cavs are jump shooting teams. Cavs were one of the top 3-pt shooting teams in the 1st two
rounds of last years playoffs.

4) Kenny will run his knock knees to the big screen and show Harden or CP3 making an error. Claim
it happens mostly the entirety of all games.

5) Then they all stuff their faces with donuts and drink their high priced coffee. Have another donut you fat
blank-blanks

 

Barkley is the biggest hater of analytics because he didn’t learn math at Auburn. Barkley has no idea that
analytics is just stats grouped together in an organized manner.

Points/ game are stats. Did Chunkie keep track of them? Yes for a big pay day.
Rebounds/ game are stats. Did Chunkie keep track of them? Yes for a bigger pay day.
Steals/Blocks/ game are stats. Did Chunkie keep track of them? Yes for a greater pay day.

Chunkie don’t lie. Don’t give me that nonsense about not caring about statistics.

 

Chuck: See hurr Kennah...thiss style uh basket bawl ain’t gunnah git them nowhere in thuh playoffs. You haff too uh-leet point garrds but there’s only wun bawl. It ain’t gunna werk. The Rawkits are pruhtenders Kennah.

Kenny: See I know a thing or two about three point shots because when I won championships in Houston, we had to shoot three pointers around a guy named Hakeem. And he kicked it out. That’s why.

Ernie: Kenny I don’t think that statement actually made sense and you pretty much just stated you won some championships as an explanation as to why the Rockets can’t win in the playoffs. On to the highlights!

::intern throws feces at Shaq::

 

I find it hilarious that chuck hates “analytics” but is a basketball “analyst”

Lmao

 

I stopped watching 5 years ago

 

Ernie: The Rockets have beat the jazz 120-105 to conclude another quality night of NBA basketball, Charles, whats you're takeaway from this?
Chuck: i alwayse sed dat 3 pointurs dont win no champeonchips, da rokets wil struggle to scor in da playofs when dey cant scor
Kenny: I wish we had C-webb instead of Shaq
Shaq: *Incomprehensible gibberish* BARBEQUE CHICKEN *inaudiable* DUMINATE DOWN LO *mumbles* MUH RINGZ ERNEH

 

Shaq was exactly right here. I think they're capable of giving better commentary, but they literally do NO research into the statistics for each team, they just go off what they heard from someone, or what they see at a glance.

 

“Enrah”

Lol

 

Total amnesia

 

clearly we're gonna see more haircuts and wigs on Chuck and Shaq

 

Music/skyline shot

EJ: Well we go into halftime in Salt Lake City with the Rockets doing a number on Utah up 22...

Chuck: Halftime? You mean we only 50 percent done with This?

Shaq: They should tell Utah to stay in the locker room

Chuck: Halftime? Enough already Ernie.

Kenny: Chuck needs his beauty sleep.

Shaq: Beauty? ain't no sleep long enough in the world to make that happen

Clips play of Rockets on offense

Chuck: sleep setting number 7 Kenny. It even make a big ugly boy like Shaq look good in the morning. Maybe good is a overstatement.

Ernie: Anyway, the Rockets undefeated since the return of Chris Paul last month, and there you see him working the two man game with Harden...

Shaq: I'm surprised yo ****** don't break the damn bed

Kenny: Ohhh he didn't.

Chuck: it's Ok big man it still under warranty

Highlight plays of a Paul pick and pop from elbow

Ernie: and there you see Paul with the pull up- it's not just Harden you have to worry about anymore on Hou-

Kenny: The midrange! Oh he did it!

Chuck: Don't Chris Paul know Daryl Morey gonna cut his ass for that

Shaq: heh heh uh huh

Chuck: he in Houston you can't do that. Shane Barrier gonna come after you with a spread sheet

Kenny: (laughing) the spread sheet hahaha

Ernie: and so the Rockets are up..

Kenny: No seriously though what Houston has done this season has been impressive, and when you put great players on the floor like a Chris Paul and a James Harden you're gonna do great things, although their schedule hasn't been super tough-

Shaq: it's been soft

Kenny: -and the question to me is whether they're going to be able to maintain it when they get to the Golden States and the San Antonio's and the OKCs

Shaq: OKC is coming around. They coming around.

Chuck: Yeah coming around all right. All the way to .500.

Ernie: Anyway Houston goes in at the break up and are cruising

Chuck: So That's the thing about Houston Ernie they been cruising all season but we never been able to see how they react when it get tougher.

Shaq; And it's going to get tougher

Ernie: And now it's time for Area 21 after the break - KG what do you got coming up?

KG
Yo Ernie tonight I got special guest Alfonso Ribiero

All: CARLTONNNN!

end/head explodes

 

Dudes I posted this 7 minutes before they actually showed ****ing carlton!!

Check the timestamp. They showed carlton at 932 EST


I just turned it on and my jaw dropped.

Insane

 

Dif anyone record the carlton picture? Was it one of the guys photoshopped as him? Seriously I was too flabbergasted to notice I really did just turn it on.

 

Sure. How long have you been producing the show?

Tell Barkley he is a fat slug......so the San Antonio ladies say

 

Here we go...

Too bad the Rockets are so good it's boring now and that thus thread is more suspenseful than the game.