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My entire basketball team has flu symptoms with 6 games left in the season

Discussion in 'BBS Hangout' started by Falcons Talon, Jan 25, 2017.

  1. Falcons Talon

    Falcons Talon Contributing Member

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    Mother nature has just kicked my teams ass. We were rolling to 40 point victories through the first half of the season, and two weeks ago, my starting big missed two games with flu like symptoms. He missed two games, and we squeeked by one game and lost the next game. After that, he came back, but I lost another starter, my 2, to the same illness, when he went to hospital and was diagnosed with pneumonia. We won the game where my 2 was out, but lost the next game, with the second starter back but recovering, However, two more starters, my 1 and my 4 missed, that game with the same symptoms....
    This morning, my 3 stayed home with the same symptoms, and my bench was all feeling ill as well.

    In my 25 years of coaching, I have never had a team hit with such a bad illness. With 6 games left in a 22 game season, we have gone from top contenders for district championship to a competitive team. We were 11-2 overall and 5-0 in district until this illness hit, and now we are at 6-2 in district, 13-4 overall.

    On top of that, I can't hold a hard practice because everyone is weakened by this damn illness. We're reduced to shootarounds.

    I've already reported this to the principal, AD, head trainer, and head basketball coach. I'll be providing gallon water containers for all my team and they will be required to go through two gallons per day and be in bed by 9pm.

    We're dropping like flies here.
     
  2. Yung-T

    Yung-T Member

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    Hit up paulftsk and jontro.
     
  3. FTW Rockets FTW

    FTW Rockets FTW Contributing Member

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    Hit up the Paul twins. paulwtfk and paulhnbx
     
  4. FishBulb913

    FishBulb913 Contributing Member

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    Middle school? Why so few games?
     
  5. Jugdish

    Jugdish Member

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    One of them got pneumonia, so I think he's coaching geriatrics. Coach needs to cut down on the lemon parties to stop the spread of the virus.
     
  6. Duncan McDonuts

    Duncan McDonuts Contributing Member

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    Sounds like your kids are passing around an STD.
     
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  7. heypartner

    heypartner Contributing Member

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    Don't be so naive. Flu-like symptoms means they are hungover from binge drinking at strip clubs.
     
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  8. Falcons Talon

    Falcons Talon Contributing Member

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    I already told them to quit kissing on each other.
     
    Rox11 likes this.
  9. Falcons Talon

    Falcons Talon Contributing Member

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    22 games is standard for subvarsity
     
  10. IVFL

    IVFL Member

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    Its simple. Have your sick kids go lick the doorknobs of the team you plan to play next. Bada Bing Bada Boom, level playing field. . . . :)
     
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  11. DonkeyMagic

    DonkeyMagic Contributing Member

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    Didn't stop MJ.

    But the good news is that it sounds like you're almost in the clear since everyone's already been sick. You should be fine in another week.
     
  12. B-Bob

    B-Bob my celli weighs a ton
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    Sounds like u need to run moar iso.
     
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  13. ipaman

    ipaman Contributing Member

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    trust the process
     
  14. heypartner

    heypartner Contributing Member

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    My HS tennis coach before State championships once said to us, "I want everyone in bed by 10 and home by 11, tonight."

    He probably gets fired for saying that now, as someone would've tweeted it for funzies, and it would be out of the team's control after that.
     
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  15. RedRedemption

    RedRedemption Contributing Member

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    Corey Brewer is available.
     
  16. HR Dept

    HR Dept Contributing Member

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    Clearly the fall in the standings can be attributed to a lack of bench depth and poor coaching. I blame the front office for trotting out another injury prone team and keeping McHale Jr. around as coach. This is what happens when you continue to kick the can down the road and not address what every in the cafeteria and library already knows.
     
  17. donkeypunch

    donkeypunch Contributing Member

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    Or medically speaking; Hardenitus
     
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  18. DaDakota

    DaDakota Contributing Member

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    Wash your hands...

    DD
     
  19. RocketWalta

    RocketWalta Member

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    Nice immune system you got there, Wildcats. ' Be a shame if something happened to it.
     
  20. gotsis

    gotsis Member

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    Play harder!
     
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