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Important PSA: America's first poop bank is open for business and wants your fecal matter

Discussion in 'BBS Hangout' started by treeman, Feb 3, 2015.

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  1. treeman

    treeman Member

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    I Visited America's First Poop Bank
    February 3, 2015
    by Luke O'Neil

    nyone who's ever taken a **** before—which is to say, everyone ever—has probably suffered from that form of anxiety when you're about to walk into a meeting or go on a first date and you worry that, midway through, you might have to stop to take a dump. Pooping may be natural, but it's not always welcome. But last week, I was struck by a different kind of performance anxiety: What if I got where I was going and I couldn't poop?

    I was on my way to OpenBiome, a facility that pays people for ****, and I was nervous as hell. Will it make me look like less of a man if I can't do the job? I worried. Taylor Swift's "Shake It Off" was playing in the car, which seemed appropriate given the topic at hand.

    OpenBiome is America's first "poop bank," which collects stool samples to help treat Clostridium difficile infections. C. diff, as it's often abbreviated, is a bacterium that causes gastrointestinal distress, and it's one of the more common hospital-borne infections: About 500,000 people suffer from it each year, resulting in around 30,000 deaths. For those who are living with it, leaving the house can be a nightmare. One of the most effective methods for treating the infection is through what's called a fecal microbiota transplantation—or, in layman's terms, injecting someone else's turds up your ass...

    ...The one in New York, where he lived, had a six-month waiting period. So he treated himself at home with a friend's stool sample and a blender.

    "It's a pretty awful experience to go through, if you ask me. Having to go though all that and then in the end you have to stick it up your butt," Burgess said. "I think for us it was pretty eye-opening. Here's this idea we were thinking about, and this could really help a lot of people."

    Full Story at link:

    http://www.vice.com/read/visiting-americas-first-poop-bank-202

    So, they will pay for your poop, and stick it up someone else's ass. What more could you ask for?
     
    #1 treeman, Feb 3, 2015
  2. CometsWin

    CometsWin Breaker Breaker One Nine

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    Deceptive. The RNC has been around for years.
     
    #2 CometsWin, Feb 3, 2015
    1 person likes this.
  3. Mr. Clutch

    Mr. Clutch Contributing Member

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    Supposed to work really well if you have an unhealthy gut.

    Better than taking pro biotics
     
    #3 Mr. Clutch, Feb 3, 2015
  4. bobloblaw

    bobloblaw Contributing Member

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    So if a person was not enema-inclined could he simply ingest his girlfriend's excrement?
     
    #4 bobloblaw, Feb 3, 2015
  5. dback816

    dback816 Member

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    Speechless.

    What will science think of next?
     
    #5 dback816, Feb 4, 2015
  6. RedRedemption

    RedRedemption Contributing Member

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    Oh man I gagged at the picture in the link.

    Aaaaaaggghhh.
     
    #6 RedRedemption, Feb 4, 2015
  7. heypartner

    heypartner Contributing Member

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    Let's hope there's no runs on the poop bank.
     
    #7 heypartner, Feb 4, 2015
  8. LosPollosHermanos

    LosPollosHermanos Houston only fan
    Supporting Member

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    brain bleach:

    NSFW

    [​IMG]
     
    #8 LosPollosHermanos, Feb 4, 2015
  9. Invisible Fan

    Invisible Fan Contributing Member

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    I've logged several miles on the Frequent Pooper club.

    Elephant Status
     
    #9 Invisible Fan, Feb 4, 2015
  10. Harrisment

    Harrisment Member

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    <iframe width="420" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/Xa-PP12lkEE" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>
     
    #10 Harrisment, Feb 4, 2015
    1 person likes this.
  11. BamBam

    BamBam Contributing Member

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    [​IMG]
    .......
    .......
    .......
     
    #11 BamBam, Feb 4, 2015
  12. conquistador#11

    conquistador#11 Member

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    do they have magazines of food? =)
    too scared to click on the link.
     
    #12 conquistador#11, Feb 4, 2015
  13. HR Dept

    HR Dept Contributing Member

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    Seems like a pretty ****ty deal if you ask me.
     
    #13 HR Dept, Feb 4, 2015
  14. B-Bob

    B-Bob "94-year-old self-described dreamer"

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    Background on why this hilarious and weird enterprise makes sense.

    About ten lbs of your current weight is a pile of teaming bacteria, mainly in your intestines. Without them, you literally couldn't get nutrients and live. There are more bacteria cells in *you* than there are actual you cells.

    So the ecosystem of your gut can get out-of-whack, and apparently the easiest and grossest thing to do is jam someone else's ecosystem in there to restore the balance. LOL.

    But now, this thread needs more poop jokes. heypartner wins so far.
     
    #14 B-Bob, Feb 4, 2015
  15. Haymitch

    Haymitch Custom Title
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    I feel like being a Poop Mogul was my calling and now I've missed it. Damn these guys for thinking of something that I should have thought of long ago.
     
    #15 Haymitch, Feb 4, 2015
  16. CCorn

    CCorn Member

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    And to think I was burning it in paper bags on people's porches for free!
     
    #16 CCorn, Feb 4, 2015
  17. moestavern19

    moestavern19 Member

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    This is a movement that could change lives.
     
    #17 moestavern19, Feb 4, 2015
  18. SwoLy-D

    SwoLy-D Contributing Member

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    [​IMG]

    :poop: :) :grin:

    [​IMG]
     
    #18 SwoLy-D, Feb 4, 2015
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