This is going back to my single days. But I would set a goal of just approaching and talking to girls. Don't make the goal to have any further contact at all. All you want to do is approach, and see if you can converse. If you do, great, if not, then it doesn't matter because it's still the practice stage. Some things that can help take it less seriously are these... 1. Even if you had the greatest conversation in the world, started a relationship, and did everything right, the relationship would probably end at some point. That's just the odds talking. 2. Try and have fun. These girls aren't better than you, maybe see if there is something about them that strikes you as amusing or interesting. It could be they have a cool hobby or job, it could be that they are so fake and shallow, that you can mess them and just have fun doing that. Either way look to how you will have fun in the conversation. 3. You are just practicing. These people don't know you, so even if they think you are a jerk, weird, awkward, whatever... It doesn't matter. After you practice and aren't that nervous about approaching then you'll be fine. Don't start out worrying about getting a date, or even future contact. Just worry about seeing if you can approach and start a conversation. There will be no pressure on you because you are just practicing.
^^^ Don't try too hard. Just start up a casual conversation....much easier if you're not in a bar etc.... I met my fiancé while doing laundry at my apartment's laundry room while in college. You never know where things might start....it all started with a random conversation....
Pop a xanax. Gets rid of the nerves and if you end up banging an ugly girl, you won't remember any of it.
@jbasket... had to quit drinking out of desperation some time ago. play the long game. since you've already stopped drinking, start lifting weights if you haven't already. you'll start to feel even better about yourself and a lot of times confidence won't matter. do it long enough and they'll start coming to you. have gotten hit on the last several years by a poop-ton women (though i've sent them on their merry way for obvious reasons). that's been my experience anyway. short game simultaneously... tinder. just mutually agreed upon shenanigans.
You recently quit drinking (congrats, btw) but you want to know how to pick up girls in a bar. Just seems kind of odd to me.
@javal_lon Ha, if only. @Tha_Dude I see what you are saying about playing off their emotions, that's a good point. And married people can be crazy, that's a story for another thread, or further down, heh. No need to apologize for any rant my g. @Rocket River I think you are right about the eyes of the watchers. I'll take note of the tip. @Ziggy I had actually gotten a Naked... heh maybe she didn't want anything to do with being naked. @joeson332 I was actually talking with someone a week ago, at probably 4 am; she mentioned she was a prostitute on the side, but supposedly she actually just wanted to take me back without charging. I bounced thinking she was just going to try to dry my wallet. Chalk one up towards the wtf category. Twas lit too. @bumbum09 You are right, I know. I knew it too. Reminded me of when I was in Miami just this past week, I hung out with this girl in various ways for 18 hours. Met her with friends, then dinner with friends, pregaming at my apartment, then the club, back at my place, club, empanadas, club, sunrise, brunch, sofa on the beach. Didn't make a move and she was pissed off. Next night, tried to sleep with another guy I came with. He said no, obviously, then she found the number of his ex-gf, talked **** about him to her. Now his ex and him might get back together because of it. Thing is, I wanted to make a move of her. I just didn't know what a good time was. Of course I know now she is 9 crazy tho, didn't then (but besides the point). @London'sBurning I did not think about it that way, but I have been very negative thinking about this. I am very sure she was dtf, you are right. I've never really done the forearm thing, but it makes a lot of sense. @Rodman23 I know somebody who does that. Risky endeavor though @FranchiseBlade Never thought about just practicing it and removing expectations. I think it could be the expectations. Very helpful tips for making it less serious. @Uprising I never really struggled with the casual conversation part, but the start of the casual conversation, in a funk. Nice story about the fiance, definitely not the typical meeting place and lol at the picture. @OmegaSupreme I have a herniated disc, so I generally hit the gym however and stay in shape. Not sure if I've mentioned it before, but I still am ok when its 1) off tinder/bumble 2) they introduce themselves to me (happens more often than not) 3) set up by a friend. But shouldn't I take matters into my own hands? @ima_drummer2k Bar, or club, or house party, or hanging out, or I mean, any place where I have to "make a move", basically. Ain't got the cajones to do it in classes either, for example. Posters have used bars for their advice, but is it odd for me to go to a bar when my friends ask me to come? They bar crawl a lot these past months.
Little bump. I approached my first girl solo, no help, on 4/20 (heh), and we are now together exclusively. She's pretty cool. Thanks guys for the help! I honestly believe it helped me out.
Start talking to fat and/or ugly girls, first. Develop some rhythm there. Some simple lines are just going up, and telling they look beautiful and if they want to go out. Then introduce yourself, and have fun. Nothing fancy, keep it simple. Don't offer to buy a drink, just go up to them and tell them they look great/beautiful/pretty and see if they are interested in hanging out. If not, move on. Don't sit there and fret the other one's. Even take some fat/ugly chicks out 1-2 times like the easy 3, 4, 5's to get some mojo flowing. Take them some place cheap, can't waste too much money on them. And just be confident when you approach them, look them in your eye. Extend your hand after you tell them they look good.
I can just picture now a guy walking up to a smoking fine chick "hey girl, look at that old piece of **** over there, can't even lift 60lbs! How about I take you out sometime?"
