Butt Crack Plan of Attack?

I will say this, and god bless the euros, but the bidet is an amazing contraption. When in the shower, the detachable showerhead serves the same purpose. When outdoors and applicable, a garden hose also works.

Couple of winters ago, I had to take a **** out on the ranch. I have nothing to really clean myself but 2 sheets of paper towels, it's 28 degrees, and I look at the water trough: "ice can't be that thick". So I take my pants off, do my business, wipe as best I can, break up the ice and lean my ass over the edge so I can finish cleaning up...and the water is fuuuuuuucking cold....then I lean too far and go ass over elbows, full dunk. Hiked back to the truck neekid, found a pair of socks, a t-shirt and shorts, and a jacket, cranked the heater and drove back to the cabin. Good times.

 

You need to wash your butt cracks extra good especially in the hot humid weather of the South East....

 

Buck this is why I’ve always liked you.

Finally someone gets it. Bidets are the way to go.

 

Bidets are one of the more civilized aspects of Europe. Not why I like to go there, but they can be pretty damn useful.

 

The ad's here aren't on butts anymore.

Time for some more butts then.

 

Respect.

Nah, the ones I'm seeing are all about household contraptions to help you savages wash your asses.

Not sure if they come with an instruction manual.

 

Rag everytime

 

I haven’t used a rag to shower in years. I use one of those round sponge/loofah things and body wash.

 

Exactly, before they were, well, butts. Large gap between those.

 

Y'all ****ed page 4. Bozos.