Except for the religious and "marriage" aspect of the story, and the women rarely seeing each other, this sounds like some of the relationships I was aware of back in the late '60's. Actually, it sounds nothing like those relationships, on reflection. I wonder how the Birts, in general, will react to the story. The woman implied that it wasn't uncommon to have these relationships in the Muslim community there. Interesting, OP.
I just find it cool how women are morphing what you would think to be demeaning to women into tool for empowerment.
As long as no one is hurt or oppressed, I can't see a good reason not to allow this kind of relationship. I certainly wasn't bothered by the similar (but different!) living arrangements that were not uncommon in the sub-culture I was a part of, back in the day.
Sounds neat to me. Who knows how the first wife feels about sharing a hubby, but then again who knows how any wife really feels about their marriage.
That's kind of my feeling as well. The women may say it's grand, but they may not be admitting to themselves or others the negative consequences that come along -- but then that's probably something that could be said about all marriages and probably all human relations. It doesn't sound ideal to me, but people will do what they can to make the best of their situation. It would be interesting to see statistics on outcomes -- does it affect rates of abuse, of divorce, of child-bearing, of child success, and so on. It does sound like the first wife was forced into it.
Don't like it. Unfortunately, marriage is inherently patriarchal and this just reinforces male primacy and centrality. I really don't like it when religious and ethnic minorities do it, either, I think it's counterintuitive against long-term acceptance and assimilation.
LOL @ Mathloon and adeelsiddiqui clutching to straws and applauding this fluff piece. Raven spoke the truth. Caged bird singing.
Not forced? The first wife was unhappy at first according to the article but "came around." Meaning, she couldn't get a divorce and the man had all authority to do whatever he wanted. For the second wife it's no different than being a well paid side piece with the benefit of having financial guarantees through a marriage contract.
I think it is wrong to assume the second wife does or should have any issue with the arrangement. Plenty of western women enjoy the mistress role. Everything she said makes sense. She has the financial security of a successful husband, gets financial compensation if she doesn't get allotted time and she doesn't have to worry about being a wife all the time. There are plenty of American women who would kill for that relationship. They settle for being the sidepiece with no financial guarantees.
That's true. But that is only one aspect. I don't care about how many women a guy has. The discrimination has many other aspects.
LOL at you thinking this is okay. This dumb chick is nothing but a sugarbabe to her factory owning husband. I can't comprehend how anybody with an ounce of common sense would think this is what Mohammed had envisioned Islam to be.
Fair enough. Simply pointing out that there's no reason to think this article is falsely portraying the situation as she sees it. I bet she is happy with it. The telling part was the comment about the first wife "coming around." In a situation where she had no choice, couldn't divorce her husband without severe repercussions, I'm sure she did come around.
Maybe the 1st wife is caged, but the 2nd one isn't. She is using the system to her advantage. She wasn't forced to do anything. She was focused on her career just needs a guy on the side without too much commitment and that is essentially what she is getting.
Agreed. The first wife is the one that is caged. She married a man obviously not thinking this would ever be an issue. Then she had it forced upon her. The skanks in the US that are sleeping with their married boss for a raise, pieces of jewelry, free rent and job security aren't usually the ones that are going to complain about their situation.
It sounds like it, and that would be the strongest argument against the arrangement, IMO. I'd love to see an interview with the first wife to get her side of it.
