This is kind of a last resort repair all, but y'all should really consider having a baby -- the love from an infant will bring the two of you closer than you would ever imagine.
Isn't having a child the WORST idea to fix a broken relationship? There should be a good foundation to build on when raising a child.
Girlfriend sounds like she's a giver. A good person..........but the situation sounds like something nobody would sign up for. You're damned if you do, damned if you don't. I bet your parents would be more than happy to have you in their spare room a few nights a week. Surely they could use some "help" that would allow you to get away some.
There is no question that it is a tricky situation and it will cause a fight. I guess it depends on whether or not her children are taking advantage of him. Yeah no. Last time I went to taco tuesday with @Jontro I had blisters all over my lips and had to go to the doctor.
Is there a reason her children and their spouse moved in? Are they not capable of working? Is there an exit plan for them? I'm with @KingCheetah on this one. Having her mom move in, okay.......... but that many people? Those are not his children either.
Well it is her house and family, but she should have put deadlines on the adult kids stay -- seems like common sense an extended stay would create serious relationship problems.
Enabling people is not being good to your blood. I know she is thinking she is helping them, but she has both her children, her daughters husband and their dog in that house. There is no excuse for them not being on their own by now. That is two able bodied adults. I really think you should talk to her about it over dinner. Perhaps offer to financially help her daughter and son in law to move out for awhile. From what you are saying, I suspect you would be okay with the son and mother in law there.......
I agree it is her house and they are not married. I am surprised that he has not discussed it with his girlfriend in the past. I can understand a mother in law that is old, or a grown child for a bit........... but a grown child, their spouse and their dog?
If you're trolling, its a good job. American Psychology Association: After having a baby, most married couples become less satisfied with their relationships, and that can have negative mental health consequences for their children.
I was just trying to help an internet friend. Sidenote: If they do have a baby all vaccinations should be avoided like the plague.
It seems like you gotta feel independent of your domain. I would start laying seeds for that with her in a non-confrontational way, and sell her the benefits of visiting your place as a way to take a break from things. She might want you to be a surrogate for a past life she enjoyed, but if she hasn't realized that, then it's harder to sell the notion of an old couple enjoying their own domains or even sleeping in different bedrooms. The fact that you enjoy each others company and have shared successes beyond past struggles should be cherished rather than reinventing the wheel of what a normal relationship should have and should be. Might take some convincing if that's where you're headed.
FT, we're all trying to help you, brother. So I'm just gonna put it out there.... If it were me, AS A MAN, I would have a YUGE problem living with a girlfriend and having everything in her name. Just seems....I don't know....kind of emasculating.... I would either 1) get married and put everything in both your names, or b) move out and continue to date while establishing your own home, your own finances and your own life.
I hear you, and I don't take offense. Marriage is NOT an option. The reality of the situation is its just the house and the boat in her name. The house was already owned by her when I met her. We didn't get it together. And in getting the boat, my bad credit would have jacked up the financing cost, so it was a financial decision to get it in her name. Just understand that I can always get another boat. At this point in my life, I've paid off all my debt (except the boat), own my truck, and, with both my sons off child support, essentially have $17k more in my pocket each year.
