Chappie - 5/10 Ok, are we starting to see some evidence that Blomkampf was a one-hit-wonder? I hope not, hopefully this was just some kind of bizarre aberration, and he can get back to some kind of good storytelling ability. But I am getting ahead of myself. Chappie, the lovable little police robot-turned-into-a-sweet-little-boy.. Let's see.. Pinocchio, and Iron Giant, just to name a couple of better versions of this story.. even RoboCop elements.. So I saw this movie, and I knew going in it was going to be weird and bizarre and very hard to swallow because of.. well.. I don't even know how to describe it.. You know those two repulsive semi-humans from South Africa who form the 'musical group' called 'Die Antwoord'? Yeah, them. Well, for some reason I cannot fathom, Blomkampf got it into his head he was going to make a robot Pinnochio story starring two of the most unappealing people on the planet. AND, he convinced Hugh Jackman to wear a terrible mullet for an entire film, so that's quite an accomplishment. Now, I'll say this - the two members of Die Antwoord were not AS terrible in the film as I had assumed they would be. They were close to that terrible, but not QUITE as awful as I had feared. Let's say I feared it would be a -10 on a scale of 1 - 10, and it was only like a -5 . And Jackman didn't know WHAT to do, so he apparently just dialed up 'generic weasel bad guy', the same one played by Rorschach in the recent RoboCop remake. And toss in Sigourney Weaver as the generic American Corporate Weasel Boss.. The story, such as it is.. some robot AI researcher has been hard at work on making a genuine human-like AI, and after an all-night Red Bull session, he cracks the case! And then has to secretly steal a police robot in order to test it out. Which he does, but at the same time, the sub-humans from Die Antwoord decide to abduct the researcher in order to get him to reveal how to 'turn the police robots off' so they can safely pull an armored-car heist. He claims they cannot be turned off, but instead offers to give them the stolen Chappie robot, which, with the new AI chip installed, is no longer a policeman robot, but is instead just a small rapidly-learning child. So the thugs decide to train Chappie to be a criminal, and there are a few crazy moments while Chappie steals some cars, and then helps the thugs rob the armored car. Amusingly, NONE of those things would have been impossible without Chappie, nor did Chappie's presence make them any easier. He was just along for part of the ride. The stolen robot chassis for Chappie was damaged, the battery 'fused to the frame', meaning, apparently, that once the battery ran out of juice, the robot would irrevocably 'die', which gives the whole things a sense of manufactured tension and angst, as Chappie learns and begins to understand the concept of his own mortality. He becomes determined to save himself, and, big surprise, he does. (And may have inadvertently found a way to save the entire human race as well, but Blomkampf dips barely a toe into that territory). Big fight with bad guys at the end, good guys win, as expected. The special effects of the robot appearing to be an actual thing in space and not just CGI was very well done. There was never a moment in the movie when I thought it didn't look totally real, so that was good. And there was one cool moment when Chappie sort of 'punished' a bad guy, in just the way a super-powered 4-year-old might do it, and that was kind of clever. But everything else.. Let me get back to the Die Antwoord thing.. Ok, I know these two are 'rappers' or 'musicians' or some such alleged thing like that. But in a movie, they were supposed to be ACTORS. And yet.. about halfway through the movie, both actors begin to appear in Die Antwoord t-shirts throughout the rest of the film - yes, the kind of shirts you would buy, at, say, a Die Antwoord concert. Nice, clean, new t-shirts, marketing for Die Antwoord, worn by the actual members of the 'musical group', while performing as actors, not themselves, in a big budget science fiction action film. even going so far as to be referencing their real-life names (or what passes for real life names for them) on the shirts. It was as though, they had got about 70% of the way through filming, and then one day the male member of the group (Ninja? I think?) went to Blomkampf and said 'Hey mate, we gonna wear our band's t-shirts during the movie. That will be cool, yeah?' and Blomkampf probably said something like, 'Uh, no, you can't do that, Ninja, that would take people totally out of the suspension of disbelief necessary in a film-going experience.' And the dude then probably said 'Screw yer suspense mate, we wearin de shirts or we walkin OFF dis muvva forkin pile of goose sheets!' Or something like that. And Blomkampf said 'Ok, screw it. Wear whatever you want, man.' And I mean, well, I know sometimes you should applaud people for going outside the box, trying to break the mold, doing something different. This was not one of those times. If Blomkampf keeps this stuff up, some Hollywood investors are going to end up kneecapping him over this kind of stunt. Bottom line, it's pretty much a hot mess. So as I was thinking about the movie the other day, it suddenly dawned on me what I had just seen, and it was this: If you went to Matt Stone and Trey Parker (creators of South Park, Book of Mormon, etc), and suggested they make a robot Pinnochio movie, this is exactly the movie they would have made, except it would have been funny. And it would have starred American rappers, like the Biggie Smalls appearance in the Satan's Sweet 16 episode. It was that level of crazy as a movie. So, see it if you want, I would wait for the Redbox at least though. Oh, and you might want to go buy about 6 PS4's.. you'll know why.
Initial commercials were SHORT CIRCUIT 2 Then the recent ones is BATTLEBOTS Movie lacked an Identity Rocket River
The Dark Valley- 4/10 Talk about a movie that loses its way. The first half of the movie just builds so well and then just falls off the face of the earth in the second half. The cinematography and setting is so beautiful, that it's such a shame for the rest of the movie.
What We Do in the Shadows 7.5/10 Anyone remember Flight of the Conchords on HBO? Half of that duo, Jemaine Clement, got together with another pal from New Zealand, Taika Waititi, and made a terrific "mockumentary" about vampires (and werewolves, and zombies, but mostly about vampires) that is simply hilarious. If you like quirky and funny, and I do, you'll like this. I hope folks can find where it's showing in Houston. Here in Austin, last week was the film showcase portion of SxSW, and while I don't think Shadows was an official entry, the producers apparently had the bright idea to get the flick on at least one screen in town during the festival. So if you can, go see it! And Nero? You're supposed to "spoiler" spoilers and heck, dude, you just described the entire film (Chappie). What were you thinking?
I dunno.. there really wasn't anything in it to spoil. Kind of like when you buy sour cream at the grocery store - do you look at the expiration date? Nah, you already know it's sour. The very few actual surprise moments in the film remain unspoiled, if anyone really cares, fear not.
I was trying to decide whether to see it or not, leaning towards not seeing it. Hey, you did me a favor! ;-)- The director seems to be a one hit wonder. I'm sure there are big fans of his, though, who might be freaked about your review. Heck, you probably did them a favor, but they might not agree. Just a friendly reminder. -
Beasts of the Southern Wild Very moving story with strong messages of courage and defiance. I loved that it was told from a child's point of view and blended myth and actuality into her own reality. Strong performances and solidly shot, even with a lot of shaky cam. 7/10
Nightcrawler - 8/10 Birdman - 8/10 Good flicks the both of them. Michael Keaton and Jake Gyllenhaal were beasts.
The original 'Old Boy', not the American version with Josh Bolin. 8/10 Good story that kept me curious the whole time and the fighting was pretty good. Don't want to get into detail but I say its worth a watch.
The Way Way Back - 7.5 if you ever wanted a good reason to hate Steve Carrell this is it, good feel good story other than that
Nightcrawler 9/10 This movie was a pretty amazing accomplishment. I think it's fairly rare that one single character carries an entire movie all by himself (and no, I have not seen Birdman yet, but I will soon), but this movie did just that, and it was amazing. I will be curious to see what Gyllenhaal has to say about about this role, from the time he first read it, and what led him to create the character in the way he did, but it was fascinating. For those who have not seen it, here's a brief synopsis: Jake Gyllenhaal plays a socially-awkward person, Lou, who is also, we come to learn, calculatingly brilliant, and who also apparently lacks any sort of moral compass. He feels a bit lost in life, never yet having found his true calling, and purely by accident, he stumbles upon what we find out are called 'Stringers', independent contractors who roam the streets at night, filming accidents, crimes, etc, anything they think they can sell to the ultra-competitive local news stations, for airing the next day. He decides to 'give it a try', and he sort of accidentally does fairly well with his first effort. So he dives in, and I mean big time. The movie then chronicles his climb up that unsavory ladder, and in particular the ruthless and unethical things he is unblinkingly willing to do to achieve his goals. I kept thinking, the longer the movie went on, 'There's no way he survives this movie. Movie rules do not allow this kind of character to survive, much less thrive.' You will probably be thinking that too. Anyway, Gyllenhaal's performance was.. stunning. He so completely transformed himself into this weird, awkward, mealy-mouthed guy with an unsettlingly intense stare. I have a hard time with his not receiving an Oscar nod for this work. It was that good. As for the movie itself.. my own personal opinion is that the movie was an allegory, and the character of Lou Bloom was intended to be a personification of blind amoral ambition, single-minded determination to achieve goals without consideration of anything else. One could say it was a subtle condemnation of what some people think of as 'greedy corporations', focused only on their own goals, without regard to harm being done to anyone else. Especially when taking into consideration Lou's obsession with 'corporate-speak' gobbledygook nonsense he picked up from business classes and self-help seminars online. Having said all that, Lou might actually make a pretty good boss .. as long as you don't disappoint him.. :grin: Highly recommended!
I have to warn you, don't expect Birdman to be a movie where "a single character carries an entire movie by himself." It's Keaton's movie, no doubt, but the various performances were SO rich that I would never say he carried it by himself. In fact, Edward Norton's performance in Birdman was my favorite in the movie and probably my favorite performance of the past 2 - 3 years. Watts and Stone are also reliably excellent. I hope you enjoy Birdman, Nero. My wife and I found it absorbing, excellently acted, and one of those movies that sticks in your brain for a few days.
I picked up the DVD, looks like tomorrow night will be the time to see it. I am looking forward to it!
