Dual Sex Bathroom Etiquette

[EddieWasSnubbed]

Today, I got "sick" at a game I was watching. The only bathroom was a port-o-potty.

So, while I'm sitting on the crapper in this toilet in the middle of a field, some random person comes up and knocks on the door. I swear to God, this is the most awkward social situation a person can ever be in. What are you supposed to say? Usually, I just say what comes to mind. Today, it was, "Sorry." Somtimes, I say, "occupied," or, "someone's in here," but I never know if I'm correct.

So I'm just wondering what you guys all say, and what is proper? What is the proper thing to say to someone when you're using a one stall dual-sex bathroom, and someone is knocking at the door?



Also, as an aside, I'd like to present another one of the most awkward social situations in the world:

So, I'm sitting there on the crapper, and I mean, I got "sick," so I was back for a second time....Meanwhile, this second trip is taking a while. After the long trip, I open the door, only to see two older women standing there, watching the door, with this half smirk/half smile on their faces.

This begs me to wonder how long these women were standing there, and what is going through their minds. What did they think I was doing in there? Are they afraid to enter after me, and only doing so to be polite?

Awkward.

[Cohen]

'Occupied' is fine. Say it rudely and they may not bother you again. :)

As for embarassment...it's only natural and everyone does it. Don't worry about it.

[SwoLy-D]

I don't say ANYTHING. I'd recommend just "BuSY!"

You usually DON'T have to say anything. When you lock the port-o-potty from the inside, it says "OCCUPIED" or "LOCKED" from the outside. WTF are people doing knocking on it, anyway? :mad: I hate it when that happens. Wait your turn, b*tches.

On the aside note, don't look at their faces, don't become a worried person just because they go AFTER you. F*ck them, make some humorous remark ("I hope you brought deodorizer [whew!]"), but don't worry about it. You more than likely won't see those people again EVER.

[EddieWasSnubbed]

On the aside note, don't look at their faces, don't become a worried person just because they go AFTER you. F*ck them, make some humorous remark ("I hope you brought deodorizer [whew!]"), but don't worry about it. You more than likely won't see those people again EVER.
I'm really not that embarassed. I mostly just made this thread because I figured it'd bring some entertaining responses (like the deodorizer comments :) ).



It really is an awkward moment, though. It seems to be a moment that you'd see a comedian talk about, or a sitcom (i.e. Seinfield) play off of.

[WhoMikeJames]

You could try and scare them off from the smell. :D

The worse is when its those stalls with the broken hinge.

WMJ

[arkoe]

I agree with Swoly, I don't say anything. They can't do anything about it, and I'm not rushing for them if I can't help it. Go ahead, keep on knocking. It just means I'm going to pee all over the seat before I leave.

[TMac640]

I agree with Swoly, I don't say anything. They can't do anything about it, and I'm not rushing for them if I can't help it. Go ahead, keep on knocking. It just means I'm going to pee all over the seat before I leave.

lmfao :D

[DonnyMost]

Just make really loud farting noises.

[AntiSonic]

Today, I got "sick" at a game I was watching. The only bathroom was a port-o-potty.

So, while I'm sitting on the crapper in this toilet in the middle of a field, some random person comes up and knocks on the door. I swear to God, this is the most awkward social situation a person can ever be in. What are you supposed to say? Usually, I just say what comes to mind. Today, it was, "Sorry." Somtimes, I say, "occupied," or, "someone's in here," but I never know if I'm correct.

So I'm just wondering what you guys all say, and what is proper? What is the proper thing to say to someone when you're using a one stall dual-sex bathroom, and someone is knocking at the door?


Don't sweat it. The person knocking on the door was the one not practicing proper ettiquette. Sheesh, the door is closed. Wait your freaking turn.

[StupidMoniker]

I say, "Wow, I don't remember eating THAT!"

[Stack24]

Just make a weird noise or Grunt...

[OmegaSupreme]

I agree with Swoly, I don't say anything. They can't do anything about it, and I'm not rushing for them if I can't help it. Go ahead, keep on knocking. It just means I'm going to pee all over the seat before I leave.

that's a darn good idea. evil, but still good. gmao. :D

[arkoe]

Seriously, what do people think, that I like being in the port-o-potty? I want to get out of there as fast as I can. If I'm in one of them long enough for someone to come and knock, chances are it's going to take as long as it's going to take. I'm not going to pinch it off, so leave me alone.

[Saint Louis]

Just say, "I'm going to be a while putting my intestines back in."

[OmegaSupreme]

Seriously, what do people think, that I like being in the port-o-potty? I want to get out of there as fast as I can. If I'm in one of them long enough for someone to come and knock, chances are it's going to take as long as it's going to take. I'm not going to pinch it off, so leave me alone.

FADE IN:

-arkoe walks out of the port-o-potty after spending ten minutes dropping a deuce.

old lady: "did you at least peench the bitch"

:D

[Sextuple Double]

You tell them either one:

"Wait 20 minutes"
"I had a chocolate milk shake and some orange juice"
"I was riding in my chevy and I felt something heavy"

If they continue to knock:
"I'm taking a s4!t!!!"
"Will u wipe my @$$ for me!!??"
"Did you ever have diarrhea!!??"
"I'm drunk"(make vomit noises)

[vwiggin]

"Yes, there's room for one more."

[macalu]

how's this for etiquette? don't crap on the seat. it just befuddles me how common this is. i mean, is it so hard to shoot for the bowl? sometimes i even find turd UNDERNEATH the seat. how the **** does that happen?

thank god we have clean office restrooms.

[Roxfan73]

how's this for etiquette? don't crap on the seat. it just befuddles me how common this is. i mean, is it so hard to shoot for the bowl? sometimes i even find turd UNDERNEATH the seat. how the **** does that happen?
thank god we have clean office restrooms.

Yea I've seen the underneath peanut butter surprise too. I too have pondered how such a thing could occur. I'm thinking that these folks didn't get enough play-dough fun time in their respective childhoods.

[Bogey]

Just moan loudly for a few minutes, then walk out with a satisfied grin on you face as you zip up your pants.

[Manny Ramirez]

sometimes i even find turd UNDERNEATH the seat. how the **** does that happen?



Probably the person had diarrahea...

[kpsta]

I thought this was going to be a thread about those co-ed restrooms I had in my college dorms...












:)

[macalu]

oops, wrong thread.

[vtkp99]

For a second, I thought the title said: "Dual have sex in the bathroom"...
got exited for nothing... :D

[Rocket River]

On the aside note, don't look at their faces, don't become a worried person just because they go AFTER you. F*ck them, make some humorous remark ("I hope you brought deodorizer [whew!]"), but don't worry about it. You more than likely won't see those people again EVER.


Gotta be like Michael in THE GODFATHER
walk out briskly but don't run . . don't make eye contact

Rocket River

[Isabel]

how's this for etiquette? don't crap on the seat. it just befuddles me how common this is. i mean, is it so hard to shoot for the bowl? sometimes i even find turd UNDERNEATH the seat. how the **** does that happen?


I haven't seen anything like that. Guess it's only in guys' bathrooms. You people are sick, you know that... :p

[aeroman10]

Esta John Es Ocupado!!!!

[hooroo]

So, I'm sitting there on the crapper, and I mean, I got "sick," so I was back for a second time....Meanwhile, this second trip is taking a while. After the long trip, I open the door, only to see two older women standing there, watching the door, with this half smirk/half smile on their faces.

This begs me to wonder how long these women were standing there, and what is going through their minds. What did they think I was doing in there? Are they afraid to enter after me, and only doing so to be polite?

Awkward.

So what are you trying to say politely? That they were hookers?

[Zac D]

Probably the person had diarrahea...

"The person"? "Probably"?

Are you going around squirting your Minwax on macalu's toilets?

How's life, Manny?

[univac hal]

For a second, I thought the title said: "Dual have sex in the bathroom"...
got exited for nothing... :D

And I thought it was a thread about how to handle two ladies at one go in the bathroom. Guess my expert advice ain't needed here then..

[Pocket Rockets]

"I'm not finished with her yet" while making sex noises

[Jugdish]

Say, "Hey, I'm sitting on the toilet seat of A PORT-O-JOHN!!!"

They'll run away screaming that the sky is falling.

[thewaterox]

I haven't seen anything like that. Guess it's only in guys' bathrooms. You people are sick, you know that... :p

Guys tend to have the Mt Saint Helens effect. A lot of built up pressure and then the explosion happens. :D

By the way EWS, has the swelling gone down? The way you were talking the other day I'm surprised you could fit your testees in a port-o-potty. :D

[Invisible Fan]

how's this for etiquette? don't crap on the seat. it just befuddles me how common this is. i mean, is it so hard to shoot for the bowl? sometimes i even find turd UNDERNEATH the seat. how the **** does that happen?


Carpet bomb when there's no ground support.